Ellis: A Look Back at Year One

In honor of Ellis' upcoming birthday, we're taking a look back this week. 

First, my pregnancy with him.

Then, yesterday, his birth day.

And today, we're looking back at his first year. 

Precious memories, for sure. 

Ellis' Birth Day

On Wednesday, January 28, 2009, thirteen days past my estimated due date, and 33 hours after my labor started, I gave birth to my little [8 pound, 8 ounce] Ellis. I distinctly remember when he was laid on my chest after his birth, the thought crossed my mind, "Oh my gosh, I had an actual baby!" As if this was a surprise after nearly 42 weeks of pregnancy! It was a reality I couldn't wrap my mind around until that moment... And then we locked eyes, and I was a total goner. I loved him like I had never loved anyone or anything in my life. I knew that I would dedicate my life to protecting him. It was a very distinct shift in my world.

I hear it all the time--this notion that women not only give birth to their babies, but that they also give birth to themselves as mothers. For me, it was completely true. I labored long and hard, both in the immediate sense, and over the 15 months prior to becoming a mother. Neither my journey to motherhood nor my labor was as challenging as some mothers', but both were the most challenging things I had done up until that point.

I was completely transformed. I felt like I was seeing the world with new eyes; I'd been given admission into a secret club. The secret I knew now was how deeply parents love their children. My parents, my grandparents, friends, strangers...I understood then that they all loved their children with this fierce, transformative love.

And so began my adventures with Ellis, one of the greatest loves and teachers of my life.

In early labor at home with our doula looking on

Eric helping me through a contraction

 

Ellis' Birthday Week

Ellis' 4th birthday is a week from today (*sniff*), and so I thought it would be fun to have a look back at his life so far. It's hard for me to believe that he'll be four years old...I suppose this is how it always goes. I'm thankful that he's healthy and growing up, and yet it's very bittersweet to have my first baby become so un-baby-like.

For today, let's have a look back at my pregnancy with Ellis. I absolutely loved being pregnant. Ellis' pregnancy was my second pregnancy, following a devastating miscarriage at 13 weeks in my first pregnancy. Ellis' pregnancy was fraught with anxiety at times, but it was also filled with gratitude for the opportunity I was being given to be a mother. I loved him fiercely from the very beginning.

J. Hoffine

This is the last photo of me prior to labor photos. I was 39 weeks pregnant...Ellis was born a whopping 20 days after this photo was taken. Suffice it to say, I was enormous.  

New Year's Resolution

My new year's resolution this year was to get more organized. My thinking was that if I got organized, then I'd be more efficient, and therefore would have more time to do the things I want to do.

So come January 1, I was all pumped....and then I spent the next 2 weeks taking care of sick kids or fighting sickness myself. If you're a parent, you know that a family's household work is so unrelenting that you can't let it go for even a day without disastrous consequences. You may be out of commission, but those darling little mess-makers don't miss a beat. Even when they're not actively tornadic, they still need to be fed and clothed.

Well, let's just say that my house was in rare form this week. As in, if my neighbor had come by for a cup of sugar (or more likely, a Diet Coke), I would've had to move...and change my name.

I haven't felt fabulous this week, but I have chipped away at the mess here and there, and by today, most of the house could pass for clean (most importantly, the parts visible from the front door). I've even done a bit of organizing. Who says resolutions are made to be broken?

Here are a couple snapshots of my organizational efforts: a utility organizer and a grocery bag holder. Hey--it's a start!

Mama's Helper

I love this stage when they really want to be a part of what I'm doing. They may not be helpful--in fact, they may create more of a mess with their "help"--but the idea that they can be helpful is a valuable one.

He's a Quick One

At breakfast this morning, I was using our cow creamer to pour milk in the boys' oatmeal. Oliver was positively delighted. "Moo!"

I asked Ellis if he loved the cow too. He said, "I'd love it more if it had udders."

Nothing gets past Ellis, that's for sure.

Tunnel Vision

We have a tunnel.

This tunnel has been everything from a car wash to a cat bed.

It is well loved by all the small creatures in this home.

On this particular day, it was Oliver who loved the tunnel.

By the way--Did you notice that the blog has a new look? I'm working on it. I don't love it just yet, but it's better than it was and I'm too stinkin' tired to work on it anymore. Have I mentioned that we've all been sick? I'm exhausted.